MIRRORS: Amy Self

1985. Birmingham, UK.

  • Who are you?

My name is Amy. I am 25 and live in Birmingham, UK. I use a pseudonym for my blog: Nancy Parr. Reasons for this; My Mom wanted to call either my Sister or I ‘Nancy’- neither of us gained the name (My Sister is called Kate), but both adore it, especially in the knowledge that Mom would abréviate it to ‘Nan’. And ‘Parr’; that was my Great-Nan’s maiden name. Apparently we are descendants of Old Man Parr. He lived past his 100th year of age and continued to bare children for some time hence!

  • What is it that took you to write your world with words?

I see writing as a theraputic, cathartic process. I battle with anxiety and with a hundred voices in mind. So, to channel such into semi-structured lines of prose helps to process my thoughts, feelings and rhetoric that would normally lie in mind stagnating, causing buttelfies the size of albotross to supersed my soul.

  • What do you write between lines?

My writing, that which I am brave enough to post on my blog, is me- in entirity. So I suppose my ‘between lines’ state manifests in conversation, face-to-face. I feel the ability to be wholly honest in my writings, for better or worse. This does not always occur when in person due to confidence flaws! So, when reading my lines you see the real me. When

meeting me in person you see me, between lines. But, one may argue you, ‘between lines’, is you in whole, outside a concious state of conforming to that you feel is you…

  • What can we see in your mirror?

Jacques Lacan wrote about one’s reflection. I analysed a section of this writing for a seminar during my first degree (Sociology). Sharing the surname with one of Lacan’s main threads of concentration, the ‘self’ I have always been taken with his path of thought.

Within this paper he spoke of how we, as individuals experience our reflection. He referenced that within a reflective glass surface, mainly a vessle of transportation such as a locomotive, we become aware of the ‘self’. To me the most interesting aspect of his paper described when sat on a train, and the light is at the most forgiving to the reflective means we see our self within the window’s surface. This image is a step away from our ‘actual’ self, the being causing the reflection. Our eyes begin to drift within the map of the pane, and we see other people’s reflections. We may engage in eye contact with another’s ‘reflected’ self as oppose to their ‘actual’ self. Here we now have four potential relationships. One, between our actual self, and the reflected self. Two, that between our actual self and the reflected other, seen in the window’s surface. Three, the actual other and the reflected self, again seen in the glass. Four, the actual self and the actual other- a rare occurence, due to the ‘reality’ of its exchange. Lacan believed the probability of eye contact is more likely to occur within a reflection than in ‘actual’ life as it is deemed safer in reflection. This astounds me, facinates me and pulls me in everytime I contémplate it.

I focus alot on the ‘self’ within my writings. They are my mirror, they reflect my inner core, what it is to be Amy, without the hesitance that sometimes prevents me to portray such in ‘real’ life. I personify Lacan’s expectations!

  • Define you in 5 words.

SMILE: to feel each and every one; in eye, in heart, in mind.

DAYDREAM: where my inner dialogue is free

THOUGHT: inner voice(s) take hold

LANGUAGE: my first love

CONSCIOUSNESS: my most cherished entity

  • Which character would you be in a novel?

Perhaps an old spinster, living in a house full of cats, surrounded by worm-bitten books, sitting aside a log fire, upon a rocking chair… whose mutterings become an almost narrative to the wider makings of the storyline. The insight of experience, age and female intuition. That which was once dismissed as pure lunacy.

  • Tell us the quotes that describe you best.

‘We sometimes encounter people, even perfect strangers, who begin to interest us at first sight, somehow suddenly, all at once, before a word has been spoken’ (Fyodor Dostoyevsky).

‘all of them felt, consciously or unconsciously, that if they let go of the magnet that created the pattern, the atoms of past cultures would again fall back into random dustheaps’ (Gombrich).

  • Recommend us a book/writer (or as many as you want!)

Crime and Punishment, Fyodor Dostoyevsky.

Moby Dick, Herman Melville.

Nineteen-Eighty-Four, George Orwell

**All for their amazing use of metaphor, description, lanugage per sa to teleport you into wonderous worlds of feelings, imagination and pure genius!

  • Your motto?

Add to, never subtract from.

  • Where can we read you?

https://tiptoesofnancyparr.wordpress.com/

(Do you want to be a “lonely walker”? We want to interview you! Write us at thelonelywalkers[at]gmail.com!!)

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4 Responses to MIRRORS: Amy Self

  1. Pingback: Tweets that mention MIRRORS: Amy Self | Thelonelywalkers' Blog -- Topsy.com

  2. Pingback: Mirrored mirror of the mirrored mind… « Nancy Parr: a tip of the toe

  3. Jonathan says:

    i love the way your words land.

  4. Pingback: Mirrored mirror of the mirrored mind… | Nancy Parr: a tip of the toe

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